Confessions of a Second Child

Because I am the second child, I always felt that I came in second as a young girl. And, while second is often quite a good spot to end up in, it is never optimal in a household where competition is king. In our house, because my father was a professional football coach, winning was everything. There were no trophies for 2nd place. So being the 2nd child felt like a punishment of sorts.

This was the attitude I carried with me for many years-2nd best. However, through my writing I have come to see that that mindset was really all my own doing. It was intimately related to my birth order and the competitive nature of our household. It was a condition I put on myself, not something that others did to me. This realization has enabled me to open my heart more fully to my sister and my parents. It has helped me to take the edge off of my own judgementalness, and heightened my sensitivity to the burdens we all carry from our childhood.